HDR 43

Movie reviews are more fun in groups of 5!

30 days of night:
Vampire movie! Woo! Well, kind of. I think a good vampire movie should include lots of random death scenes including lots of screaming and blood only coming from 2 smallish holes in the neck about 1.5 - 2 inches apart much like 2 sharp fangs in a human mouth would produce. Also, there should be at least one scene of hot girls being stupid and getting killed and one scene of someone doing something idiotic and the audience being happy they died. This movie was set in the Arctic North of Alaska and didn't include much of the above. There were lots of screaming deaths yet the blood and gore was over the top and I think there was only one mildly hot girl in the movie and she was decked out in cold weather clothes 99% of the movie. I get the point that "up in the cold there's 30 days of night and the vampires don't get destroyed by the sun there" but the way they rampaged through the towns you'd think they'd rule the world in 30 mins. Anyway it was lame and over the top but not in a funny way therefore it just doesn't get a good grade.

Higherdef Rating: 2


You Don't Mess With The Zohan:
Parts of this were really funny and parts of it were in that Sandler category of funny that I just don't think is that funny. It was kind of like Billy Madison but Sandler is like 15 years older and it doesn't fit anymore. I think some immature humor is funny and other times it's just bad. Like I said, this movie had it's funny moments but in the parts that weren't funny it was REALLY not funny. Anyway it wasn't a terrible movie but it just didn't serve any purpose except to be funny and it didn't really accomplish that with a passing grade. I'd give it a 60 at best for funniness and that's a 3 out of 5 in my scale so that's how I'm grading it.

Higherdef Rating: 3


Holes:
A bunch of "bad" kids are sent to a rehabilitation center that involves digging holes to build character. The kids have a pretty miserable existence while digging but learn the ropes of the system and are working towards a better future. The overseers of this "prison" are pretty corrupt and clearly have an agenda but it takes a lucky break from an unsung hero who is wrongfully imprisoned to bring it out. There's a synopsis for you.
Decent movie about fate and luck. It was a "kids" movie but really was well done in general. It could have been tweaked just a tiny amount and really been pleasing to all audiences as well as children but they clearly had a younger crowd in mind when they made this movie. I think that Shia LaBeouf is a good actor and I'm extremely disapointed that he decided to take up smoking and being a jackass as he's aged. He still did a good job in this one and so did the rest of the cast. Even The Fonz did a good job as the dad of Shia.

Higherdef Rating: 3.5


Wanted:
I saw all the previews and really wanted to see this movie in theaters but b/c of all the other great movies that came out last summer this one didn't get seen until blu-ray DVD... sigh... I guess I'll survive. Wanted is a movie about an elite group of assassins that have a strange ability to see things slower and do things that are impossible. I liked the fact that the filmmakers really went outside the normal with the visualization and reality of this movie. They didn't try to make it realistic or stick with the norms of special effects. They did a lot of great live action shots and blended them in with special effects to near perfection. I liked the action and was def left wanting more. I would like to think that there will be another movie like this but I doubt there will be. The plot was a little strange and probably ended a little melodramatically but I still liked it.

Higherdef Rating: 4


Bangkok Dangerous:
This was a fitting movie for Nick Cage. He's getting a little up there in age and isn't quite living up to his bad ass persona as well as he once did. So in this movie he takes the role of a nearly retired hitman who is possibly making his last hit before calling it a career. He has a few rules to follow and ends up breaking a few of them along the way. I liked this movie but still haven't decided which ending I liked better. They both were good and I'm pretty sure the director made the correct choice in endings but it won't make as many people happy as the other but still a good artistic choice.

Higherdef Rating: 4